Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Scary Lesbian Kisses Threaten WNBA Viability


There will be no kiss cams at Washington Mystics games
. What is a kiss cam you ask? It is a ubiquitous practice at NBA games where the TV camera pans the crowd, picks a couple (heterosexual, of course) and projects their image on the Jumbotron. The crowd calls for them to smooch. When they do, everyone cheers. Harmless fun, right?

That is unless the couple consists of two women. Defending the decision to eliminate the Kiss Cam Washington Mystics owner Sheila Johnson cited the “inappropriateness” of women kissing women and the potential for alienating other fans who are largely dads and daughters.

OK, I understand that the WNBA is on somewhat shaky financial ground, especially in this economic climate. I get that WBNA owners and players want to keep fans in the seats. I understand that these factors make them shy away from associating with anything they see as controversial or potentially a threat to the viability of the league.

What I don’t get is the on-going outrageous homophobia and outright disrespect for lesbian fans. What makes me sad is the deep seated internalized homophobia of lesbian fans and players who collude with these heterosexist practices: “We will only be tolerated if we remain invisible, well-behaved, inoffensive, appropriate (and heterosexual people get to decide if we pass this test).”

Hello! Everyone already knows that lesbians play in the WNBA. Everyone already knows that lesbians are a major part of the WNBA fan base. The WNBA needs lesbian players, fans and coaches. If we had a lesbian walk out or boy (girl) cott, the WNBA would really be feeling the hurt. Yet, lesbians in the stands and on the court are expected to be “appropriate” which, of course means shut up, sit down and make yourself as invisible as possible. When will this charade end? Everyone is afraid of offending anyone who is not a lesbian, but apparently lesbians are supposed to take slap in the face after slap in the face and turn the other cheek for more. Enough.

If I had known how powerful a lesbian kiss is, I would have been using it to address some issues I’d like to see changed. Violence against women? Let’s harness the power of lesbian lip locks to scare those perpetrators into submission. A screwed up health care system? Give me some lesbians sucking face, we’ll see if that doesn’t get those guys in congress to act.

I mean, of course, I discovered the power of participating in a lesbian kiss a long time ago, but I had no idea of its potential for affecting hundreds of people at a time by virtue of merely witnessing a good ole dykacious lip smack. If we can clear a basketball arena with just one kiss projected on the Jumbotron, just think what else we could accomplish. Smack! I bet I could always find a parking place. Smack! I could make the Red Sox win. Smoocharoo! I get a place at the front of the line at the bank. Pucker up, baby! I can silence those rude cell phone users in public places – all by deploying the power of my lovely, luscious, lavender, lesbian lips.

I call on all my Sapphic sisters! Rise up! Lick those weapons of mass affection on your face. Pucker up and change the world. Apparently, we’ve been given greater gifts than we ever imagined. Let’s canoodle the world into equality and justice.

155 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sheila should worry more about building a winner. That tends to put fans in the seats.
SWALesbianK!

Harold M. Clemens said...

the NBA is politically sanitized as well. I too understand the $$-bottom-line, but, as you point out: it's kinda silly to pretend fans will be repulsed when many of them are in same sex relationships anyway. seems more like a top-down fear/prejudice than a reflection of profit concerns.

Anonymous said...

And frankly, wouldn't the sight of women kissing bring in more male viewers?

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I don't think the WNBA is deliberately singling anybody out though. stand on the innovative post it looks like some in the Lesbian fan base have a dissimilar outlook.

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Xenical said...

It's a shame how the american society still struggles with accepting homosexuell couples. In "The Land of the Free" it seems like people are not at all free to decide who they want to love! What is wrong about showing two woman or two men kiss?! Thanks for the post. It's important to talk about that topic in order to change people's mind...

Jack said...

While the homosexual agenda can be forced upon us the fact is no amount of an attempt to mainstream it will ever change the fact that this is a minority lifestyle choice. You can legalize it, sanatize it and even teach it in our schools but you can't force fathers and their kids from buying tickets to support it. That sucking sound you hear is the WNBA being flushed down the drain.

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Everyone is afraid of offending anyone who is not a lesbian, but apparently lesbians are supposed to take slap in the face after slap in the face and turn the other cheek for more.

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The crowd calls for them to smooch. When they do, everyone cheers. Harmless fun...

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What makes me sad is the deep seated internalized homophobia of lesbian fans and players who collude with these heterosexist practices..

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It's a nice article man. I never saw a match from WNBA, but i'm looking forward to..

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