Heeeere's Johnny!

Last night I had planned on watching the UConn Women’s Basketball team trounce Notre Dame, but while cruising through the channels I came upon the U.S. National Figure Skating Championships men’s final free skate.

Evan Lysacek, the defending champion, was in second place to Johnny Weir, the former three time champ, after the short program. Now, I know next to nothing about figure skating (Except that you are not allowed to whack your opponent across the knees with a baseball bat right before the competition. Thank you, Tonya Harding). My own ice skating choreography is limited to the combination of a single toe stumble followed by a double arm windmill culminating in a double cheek butt slam (Ouch). Nonetheless, men’s figure skating in general, and Johnny Weir in particular do capture my attention because, in the words of junior high school students everywhere, it is so gay (not that there is anything wrong with that).

Much to the dismay of national and international skating officials, men’s figure skating has always been perceived as a “gay” sport what with all the sequins, make-up and leotard tops. And truth be told, there probably are lots of gay male figure skaters, a few of whom have come out publicly: Rudy Galindo, Brian Orser, and John Curry to name three prominent gay skaters.

Alas, figure skating governing organizations and judges are very conservative about their gender politics. They like the women to be child-like, frilly and feminine, not too athletic or muscular, please. They like the men to butch it up on the ice: More quad jumps and “classic elegance” (read masculine choreography, whatever that is),” and less “flamboyance” and fewer sequins (read gay). Suffice it to say that men’s figure skating is a teensy bit defensive about its gay image. In pairs competition, heterosexual pairs only, of course. Same-sex pairs are strictly verboten.

Johnny Weir loves sequins. He has described his costumes as “princessy.” He refuses to “butch it up” on or off the ice. Commentators describe his skating style as “lyrical,” “artistic,” and “flamboyant” which, of course, means “gay.” Johnny must drive the figure skating establishment nuts. I bet they were all rooting for Evan Lysacek last night. (FYI, Evan did win even though he and Johnny had the same number of points. Apparently the free skate, which Evan won, carries more weight in the scoring).

Speculation about Johnny’s sexual orientation is rampant on the internet. He certainly gets my gaydar twanging. Johnny, however, has not come out. He maintains that who he sleeps with is no one’s business but his. In a bizarre twist, he has been publicly criticized for not coming out by a really snarky gay guy, Mark Lund, who is head of International Figure Skating and Rudy Galindo, an openly gay former national champion who has taken over Leona Helmsley’s title as the Queen of Mean.

Some heterosexual reporters have defended Johnny’s refusal to identify his sexual orientation on the basis that it is private information. Other commentators claim that it is homophobic for reporters not to ask because the silence assumes being gay is something that should be hidden and creates a double standard when heterosexual athletes’ sexuality is on display for all to know.

I always celebrate when gay, lesbian and bisexual athletes come out. I believe their openness makes it easier for other gay athletes who come after them. I wish they would all just get it over with and tell everyone.

I also know that, because we have not yet won the battle against homophobia in sport, there can be negative consequences for some athletes and coaches who are openly gay. For this reason, we need to respect, or at least understand, their decisions to keep it on the down low. We need to work on changing sport and society so that hiding who you are isn’t necessary. Factor in other things like racism for LGBT athletes of color and sexism for lesbian and bisexual women and the whole coming out thing gets more complicated than just calling the ones in the closet a bunch of scaredy cats.

Plus, we all know how objective figure skating judges are, right? Ok, I know what you probably thinking – Johnny might as well come out because everyone thinks he is gay anyway. Well, maybe he will, but maybe he won’t. Maybe he isn’t. We do keep confusing gender expression with sexual orientation, don’t we? I mean who suspected that Esera Tuoalo, an NFL lineman, was gay? Why not? Because he looked “straight” and played professional football. Some gay men are flamboyant and artistic; others can hide in plain view because they don’t fit our preconceived stereotypes that are mostly based on gender expression, not sexuality. Quentin Crisp said that we are all born naked, the rest is drag. Something we should all remember. Why couldn’t a heterosexual man love sequins too?

In the meantime, I think we should just let Johnny be Johnny – flamboyant, lyrical, artistic and outrageous, and maybe gay. The figure skating establishment may not appreciate it, but Johnny Weir is the most interesting and authentic character on the ice right now and, in the best of worlds, whether he is gay or not really wouldn’t matter. He’s a great skater. Even an accident waiting to happen on the ice like me can see that.

At UNC, Sexual Harassment Means Never Having to Say You’re Sorry

Last week, after 10 years, the second sexual harassment lawsuit filed against the highly successful University of North Carolina women’s soccer coach, Anson Dorrance, was settled. Both lawsuits were filed by former players on the women’s soccer team, Debbie Keller and Melissa Jennings. Keller settled out of court in 2004.

The players charged that Dorrance repeatedly initiated discussions and asked questions about the players’ sex lives. At first, Dorrance denied the charges. Then, apparently after the charges were corroborated by witnesses, he described his comments to the players as ‘locker room banter of a joking or jesting nature.” However, the U.S. 4th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled last spring that the charges did constitute sexual harassment and could proceed to trial.

Dorrance finally described his actions as “inappropriate and unacceptable” in a public letter of apology which was required as part of the settlement. To summarize: First, he denied making the comments, then he trivialized the comments as locker room banter, finally he apologized and called his comments inappropriate and unacceptable.

In his apology letter, Dorrance acknowledged that between August 1996 and June 1998, he participated with his players in group discussions of team members’ sexual activities and relationships with men (now there’s a coaching technique he left out of his video).

Then in classic non-apology style, Dorrance said in response to the settlement, "Since August 1998, I have looked forward to clearing my name in court. That is still true today. I understand, though, that after nine years of litigation, it is best for the University, our soccer program and all of us involved in this case for it to end here."

How magnanimous of him! He is only doing what is best for the university and his soccer program and even the women who brought the lawsuit by apologizing! Though he had looked forward to clearing his name, he is letting that go so everyone will benefit. What a guy!

Wait a minute. How can he clear his name when he admits that the charges are true? Oh, never mind.

Isn’t it amazing how an apology can turn around so that it isn’t really an apology at all?

UNC-Chapel Hill Chancellor James Moeser called Dorrance, “a great teacher and leader in advancing women’s opportunities in sports.” He continued, "We have never believed that the case had any merit. We’ve stood by Coach Dorrance since this case started and we stand by him now." So much for student-athlete welfare concerns. So much for taking sexual harassment charges seriously.

Clearly the university believed that Dorrance was the victim here and the two players were the perpetrators. If it weren’t for a required review of the university’s sexual harassment policies by an outside lawyer as part of the settlement, it seems like the university would be happy to move on as if nothing happened. Anson Dorrance is their guy and that’s the end of that.

Since this is an LGBT Sports blog, I have to say that I find it very difficult to imagine a university standing up for a lesbian or gay coach who made sexual comments to players. I even find it hard to believe a straight woman coach making these kinds of comments would be supported.

In the spirit of Coach Dorrance’s apology: I’m sorry if anyone is offended by anything I said in this blog post.

A Big Day at the NCAA

I was at the NCAA convention this weekend in Nashville. I helped plan a panel discussion at the conference called “Time Out! A Conversation about Including LGBT Student-Athletes.” It was definitely a two step forward day in the journey toward social justice in collegiate athletics. I worked with Charlotte Westerhaus, Vice President for Diversity and Inclusion at the NCAA to pull this event together. We had a terrific panel of John Amaechi, gay former NBA player and fabulous spokesperson for social justice in sport; Laurie Priest, out lesbian Athletic Director at Mount Holyoke College and amazing leader in women’s sport (plus she’s darn cute); and Neil Giuliano, executive director of the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation and former mayor of Phoenix, Arizona. The moderator was Jill Pilgrim, general counsel for the LPGA and, may I say, she set a new standard for me the next time I am asked to moderate a panel.

What made this event so terrific (besides the fact that it happened at all?) Several things:

• It was a great example of what good can come of collaborations between an LGBT education and advocacy organization (It Takes A Team!) and a sport governing organization (the NCAA) to address homophobia in athletics
• The quality of the panel discussion. John, Laurie and Neil were terrific: insightful, personal, funny and knowledgeable. Jill, as I said, was amazing as she directed questions to the panel and also contributed her own perspectives as a heterosexual ally
• The attendance. There were 150-200 people in the room (I’m terrible at estimates like this, but the room was full and it was a big room. I remember doing sessions like this at sport conferences years ago when the only people in the room were a few brave lesbians who believed they were risking their professional reputations by coming into the room.
• The diversity of attendees. This audience included women and men, straight folk and LGBT folk, white folk and folk of color, young people and older folk, coaches, athletic directors and student-athletes.
• Attendees were looking for resources and information: I had an It Takes A Team! resource table outside the room with our DVDs, posters, safe space stickers and a handout on guidelines for addressing LGBT issues in athletics. My goal was to make sure that the table was bare by the end of the panel. Every resource I had with me was taken and I got to go home empty handed. Plus, about 30 people signed up for the It Takes A Team monthly eletter. Contrast this with resource tables I’ve “womaned” in years past at these kind of conventions: People gave me and the table a such a wide berth as soon as they saw the words “lesbian” and “gay” that you’d think talking to a gay person or taking the resources would cause you to be gay (or make others think you were gay)
• National LGBT advocacy organizations like GLAAD are getting on board to help in the fight against homophobia in sport. GLAAD has a new sports desk headed by Ted Rybka, who I met at the panel. I see lots more collaboration ahead between It Takes A Team! and GLAAD.
• Last, but not least, as I sat listening to the panel with my good friend and colleague, Helen Carroll of the NCLR Sports Project, I realized that we are not in this alone anymore. There was a time when I felt like a voice in the wilderness trying to call attention to LGBT issues in sport. On Saturday, Helen and I got to be audience members and appreciate how far we have come and how many organizations and amazing individual people are signing on to address LGBT issues in sport.

Definitely a two step forward day to savor, especially when the one step back days come, as I am sure they will. Thank you, NCAA, Charlotte Westerhaus, Jill Pilgrim, John Amaechi, Laurie Priest and Neil Giuliano for a great day. I smiled all the way home.

Another Week, Another Email from an Angry, Scared Parent

I got another email last week from a mother whose lesbian daughter is being harassed and bullied by her coach because of her sexual orientation. The good news is that more parents are supporting their gay and lesbian children. They expect coaches and teammates to treat their out lesbian and gay kids with respect. They get mad when this is not happening. They want to do something to stop the discrimination, harassment or just plain meanness that is making their child miserable. They don’t want special treatment or to make a big deal. They just want what every other parent wants for their children: they want them to be safe, successful and be happy. So, they write to someone for help. Sometimes this is me.

I thank them for supporting their child. Some parents do not. I give them all the advice about actions they could take that might help them and their child. I identify all the resources I know of that will give them the legal, educational and emotional support they need. I encourage them to stay in touch with me, ask more questions and let me know how things turn out.

Then I get angry. I get angry at the ADs who support coaches who are bigots and bullies. I get angry at coaches who have the power to ruin young people’s athletic dreams and do it so casually. I get angry at teammates who are too intimidated by their coaches or too afraid that someone might think they are gay to support a gay teammate. I get angry at schools, sport governing organizations and coaches associations that are too timid to make or enforce policies that include actual consequences for coaches who bully lesbian and gay athletes (or those they presume are).

Typically, when a parent emails me they tell me that their child wants to handle the situation themselves. They don’t want their parents to intervene. I understand this (and so do the parents), but we worry that the deck is stacked against their child. An athletic department looking the other way, a coach with the power but not the wisdom and teammates who just want to keep their own heads down below the line of fire present formidable obstacles for one young athlete to challenge alone.

I admire the courage and heart that drive these young people to challenge such overwhelming odds for the love of the game. I respect their parents for loving their lesbian and gay children just as they are and for wanting to fight for them when things get tough. I just hate that these young people and their parents have to fight for the right to be treated with dignity and fairness.

Top Seven LGBT Sports Stories of 2007

I decided it would be fun to look back over the year and identify some stories and people who have had an impact on LGBT issues in sport for good or ill. My criteria are pretty loose. Some of the stories were widely covered, others not so much, but all of them have had an impact on making sport a safer and more respectful place (or not) for LGBT people because they draw attention to homophobia in sport and the on-going work needed to make sure that everyone such be treated with respect in sport. Why seven instead of ten? Why not? Enjoy!

1. Penn State women’s basketball coach Rene Portland Resigns: I swear I heard a coast to coast cheer of relief and joy when Rene Portland finally resigned last spring. This woman conducted an unrelenting lesbian witch hunt for over 20 years at Penn State but Jennifer Harris, the athlete who finally stood up to her bigotry with the help of the National Center for Lesbian Rights Sports Project, made it impossible for Portland to stay. Penn State women’s basketball had become a symbol of intolerance, hostility and arrogant defiance. I ranked this the number 1 LGBT sports story of 2007 because I think Portland’s resignation was a huge victory for fairness and respect in collegiate sport. The Penn State team has been competing under an ugly cloud for years. The team, under new coach, Coquese Washington, deserves a fresh start and I wish them well in 2008.

2. Ex-NBA player John Amaechi comes out: Because so few former male professional team sport athletes have come out (no active player has ever come out), this story got a lot of play in the media. Even though John was not a household name, his coming out brought important attention to homophobia in sport and he turned out to be a terrific, intelligent and willing spokesperson for social justice in sport. John is a terrific role model and inspiration to young athletes, gay and straight. His coming out also provoked Tim Hardaway’s public display of homophobia. In case anyone was under the impression that homophobia in sport is not a problem, Hardaway’s ignorant comments highlighted the need for education at all levels of sport.

3. LSU women’s basketball coach Pokey Chatman resigns after allegations that she had an “inappropriate” relationship with a player. Though Pokey never addressed the allegations publicly, her departure from LSU right before the NCAA tournament was widely covered by the press. Whether true or not, the allegations stir up all the old stereotypes of lesbian coaches as sexual threats to their players and make it more difficult for lesbian coaches to live openly and honestly with fear of negative recruiting or recrimination. As I said in my blog last spring, a sexual relationship between a coach and an athlete is not a lesbian issue, it is an ethical breach regardless of the sexual orientation of the people involved. The allegations against Chatman and her resignation feed the fears of parents and their daughters and make the work of challenging lesbian stereotypes in sport more difficult. This was a top LGBT story of 2007 we could have done without.


4. An out of court settlement is reached in the discrimination lawsuit brought by Jennifer Harris against Rene Portland and Penn State. Though most people I know were disappointed that Portland was not fired as part of the settlement, it turns out that her tenure at Penn State would only last a few weeks longer anyway. The confidential settlement cost Penn State more than money. The school’s reputation was damaged by months of negative publicity in response to their chicken-hearted wrist slap to Portland after their own internal investigation of the allegations found that she had indeed violated their discrimination policy. Nonetheless, the world can never be the same for other school administrators who choose to ignore or condone a coach’s personal prejudice. The lawsuit and settlement were a huge cautionary tale for other schools and let athletes who might encounter another coach like Portland know that you don’t have to take that kind of treatment anymore. Thanks to the NCLR Sports Project for taking on this ground-breaking case and seeing it through to the end.

5. Don Imus’ racist, sexist and homophobic comments about the Rutgers women’s basketball team: Perhaps no other story on my list got more media attention than this one. Though the focus of outrage against Imus was on the racism and sexism embedded in his comments, they were also homophobic. I wish this had received more attention in the reactions to Imus’ comments, but silence on this point makes it clear that we must do a better job helping folks make the connections between sexism and homophobia. Even though Imus has returned to the airwaves, I hope that the controversy surrounding his comments has reset the boundaries for what passes as humor in the media when it is based on racist, sexist and homophobic attacks on women, women athletes or anyone targeted by so-called shock jocks. Hats off to Vivian Stringer and the Rutgers team for responding to the comments and media frenzy surrounding them with class and sophistication.

6. Jury awards former Fresno State women’s volleyball coach $5.8 million settlement in sex discrimination case: This case was a huge victory for Lindy Vivas, a successful coach who dared to challenge athletic department officials’ failure to enforce Title IX at Fresno. Vivas claimed that her treatment was retaliation for complaining about sex discrimination in the athletic department. For her audacity, Vivas was harassed and discriminated against based on “perceived sexual orientation” and then fired. Her case was the first of three sex discrimination cases successfully brought against Fresno State by women in the athletic department over the last six months. Vivas’ case was a landmark victory because the ruling protects coaches of women’s teams who point out sex discrimination in athletics from retaliation by spiteful administrators. It also highlighted the unethical use of the lesbian label to intimidate women coaches and administrators who challenge sex discrimination in athletics.

7. USTA names National Tennis Center after Billie Jean King: What a well deserved honor for the grand dame of tennis and women’s sport. A champion athlete and tireless advocate for human rights, Billie Jean King is a national icon who has transcended her athletic accomplishments to touch the hearts and minds of many people. She has also traveled a long journey from being yanked out of the closet kicking and denying by an ex-lover in 1981 to the self-affirming lesbian she is today. She is a courageous leader, a fierce advocate for social justice and a great role model for us all.


I’m sure I’ve forgotten something, but these are the top LGBT sports stories of 2007 that I could remember. What do you think? Other ideas? Happy New Year! And remember…It takes a team, your team, to make sport safe for all (Lindsey, I had to say that just to give you a chuckle, but hokey as it is, I mean it).

What Do Glaciers and Women Coaches Have in Common?

They are both disappearing, according to the amazing Go To authorities on all things Title IX, Vivian Acosta and Linda Carpenter. In 1972 when Title IX was passed, 90% of the coaches for women’s teams were women. In 2007, women comprise about 40% of coaches for women’s collegiate teams. In the WNBA something like nine of the 14 teams are coached by men. That means that while women’s and girls’ participation in sports has been increasing steadily, the number of women coaching these teams has declined at a dramatic rate.

At the same time, the number of women coaching boys and men has always been miniscule and remains so. It’s apparent that, in terms of coaching opportunities, Title IX has had unanticipated negative results for women coaches. Men now coach about 99% of men’s teams and 60% of women’s teams.

So, the obvious question is why is this happening? I don’t think there is any one answer to the question. Many factors contribute to this situation. Part of the answer is that most decision-makers in athletics are men. When an athletic director needs to hire a coach, he often turns to the people he knows: Other men.

Because so many men now coach young women at the high school and community level, these young athletes tend to prefer men coaches. That’s what they know. They are often concerned that a woman coach will not be as knowledgeable or as tough or as successful. And so the gender imbalance becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy as young women themselves complicate the problem.

Other factors also are in play. Coaching requires a huge time commitment, in and out of season. Despite progress in equalizing the roles that women and men play in relationships, heterosexual women in relationships with men still carry the majority of the burden for home and family responsibilities. Men coaches have wives for this. The traditional story is that wives support their husbands and take care of home and family so he can focus on coaching. Men are rewarded for being driven and single-minded in their professional pursuits. We admire their leadership and aggressiveness. Women who display similar drive and ambition are still viewed with suspicion by a lot of folks. Bucking this perception takes a lot of energy.

Women coaches strap the baby on their backs and head off to practice, trying to remember to pick up some milk on the way home after practice and throw the laundry into the dryer before they go to bed. They worry about being seen as bad mothers and spouses even as they are rewarded for success as a coach. This is a lot of pressure that most men coaches do not need to deal with and accounts for why many heterosexual women leave coaching.

Of course, there are perks for being a heterosexual married woman coach too (or pretending to be). You get a lot of media attention paid to your heterosexuality and your motherhood. You get to have pictures of your family in the team media guide. This is a significant aspect of heterosexual privilege denied to lesbian coaches with families. Where heterosexual men and women coaches often highlight their marital status and children, the personal lives of lesbian coaches are a blank slate in media guides, which focus on their professional accomplishments (as it should be for all coaches, in my opinion).

Which leads me to another factor in understanding the disappearing woman coach – homophobia. Though I believe things are changing for the better, many parents and high school recruits still fear lesbian coaches or perceive them to be unacceptable leaders and mentors. This lingering stereotype prompts heterosexual women coaches to trumpet their heterosexual credentials in team media guides and use it as a recruiting tool to fend off worries about lesbian coaches. If you are an unethical recruiter, you can insinuate that the “family-friendly” environment on your team contrasts with the unsavory “lifestyle” issues rampant on the team of your biggest rival. Though this is no longer a guaranteed slam dunk with parents and high school athletes, negative recruiting like this still works far too often.

Too many heterosexual male athletic directors still believe that lesbian coaches (or women who look like what they think lesbians look like) or any woman who is not married to or engaged to a man poses an image problem for the program. What’s the best way to avoid dealing with the lesbian “problem?” Hire a man. Look at LSU. After the resignation of Pokey Chatman last year over allegations that she had an “inappropriate” relationship with a player, LSU hired Van Chancellor, who talks a lot about his family, even though he is about as far from being a lesbian coach as you can get. If you believe that lesbian coaches are a problem, what better way to reassure recruits and their parents that basketball players at LSU are safe again.

Athletic directors seem far less concerned with male coaches becoming sexually involved with their female athletes, even though these “inappropriate” relationships are rampant in women’s sports. The number of male coaches who start a relationship with an athlete and then marry her after she graduates is a real problem that has received far too little attention from athletic directors who are quick to dismiss any woman coach even on the suspicion that she has crossed the boundaries of acceptable coach-athlete relationships.

Put it all together and voila! - The disappearing woman coach. It will take some concerted efforts on the part of athletic leaders and women’s advocacy groups to address the sexism and homophobia that support the insidious and persistent myth that men are better and safer coaches than women. It would also be great if more lesbian (and gay) coaches felt they could be open about their lives and families. As long as homophobia in sport keeps them tightly locked in their closets, homophobia and sexism can be used against all women coaches. The only people who benefit from this deadening combination are heterosexual men who want to coach women.

Hurricane Brewing in Florida…And It Ain’t About the Weather

We might be calling Florida Gulf Coast University “Fresno East” soon. Over the last several months, Fresno State has lost two lawsuits to women coaches claiming sex discrimination and harassment. Juries in these cases awarded volleyball coach Lindy Vivas $4.8 million and Basketball coach Stacy Johnson-Klein $19.1 million (this is not a typo). Fresno also settled with former senior women’s athletic administrator Diane Milutinovich for $3.5 million in a similar discrimination case. In Vivas’ case, the lawsuit also included charges of discrimination based on her perceived sexual orientation. All three women had complained about sex discrimination in the athletic program.

It kind of makes me glad I am not a tax payer in California or an alum of Fresno. What a mess. What a disgrace.

FGCU was targeted with a Title IX complaint late last spring in which the only two women head coaches (out of 14 sports), a woman assistant coach and a former women’s athletic director claimed sex discrimination in the athletic program. What followed sure looks like an appalling case of massive retaliation against these women and the university’s female former general counsel. The athletic director and university officials claim otherwise, of course.

First, university general counsel, Wendy Morris, was dismissed after she claimed she was being intimidated by the interim university president over a disagreement about the Title IX complaint. An internal investigation found no Title IX violations.

Next, Holly Vaughn, women’s golf coach and Jaye Flood, women’s volleyball coach received poor job performance evaluations from the athletic department.

In early October, Vaughn resigned mid-season, saying cryptically, that she stayed as long as she could for the players, but she had done as much as she could at FGCU. A day later, Jaye Flood (the winningest coach in school history) was suspended for unspecified “student welfare issues.” Flood was very outspoken about her complaints of gender inequality in the FGCU athletic program. It was later revealed that the suspension was probably prompted because Flood allegedly grabbed a player’s shirt during practice. Flood claims she was never interviewed about the shirt grabbing claim. In November Flood was named the Atlantic Sun Conference Coach of the Year, but the university did not acknowledge it and the athletic director refused to comment on this omission.

Later in October, assistant softball coach, Gina Ramacci, was dismissed after being accused of having an “inappropriate relationship” with a student-athlete and “promoting” drug use on the team. Ramacci, who is gay, denied both charges and was later cleared on the promoting drug use charge. The university investigation concluded that the nature of the relationship with the student-athlete could not be defined, but that it was inappropriate (Huh?). Ramacci has filed a lawsuit claiming both Title IX and Title VII violations in her dismissal.

Can it be merely coincidence that, in the space of about two weeks, the only two women head coaches at FGCU and an assistant coach who all supported a Title IX complaint against the university are now gone amid unsubstantiated charges of unethical conduct and poor performance? I guess, but it stretches the imagination.

Situations like the ones at Fresno State and FGCU remind us all that sport, despite all the progress women have made as athletes and coaches, is still Guy World on many campuses and women who challenge sex discrimination in athletics must prepare for serious and vicious retaliation from male administrators who act with all the maturity (and sense of entitlement) of little boys trying to pull up the rope ladder to their private little tree fort to keep the girls out.

I sense a humongous legal and media headache coming on for FGCU. They better stock up on Excedrin and put Fresno State administrators on speed dial.